Brown hair and brown eyes,
Red hair and green eyes,
Oh, how they love to laugh,
as we make pies.
Running through the fields playing soccer,
Her brother always strying to stop her,
Come play with me he says,
I'm more fun than soccer.
Friends come over and they all jump in the pool,
Both of them trying to be so cool,
With hearts as big as the skies,
I hope they never have to cry.
Running and jumping in the leaves,
I thank God for all that he has given me.
Rachel and Shawn are their names,
To me, there is no one quite the same.
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This was really sweet. =] I hope you let them read it. I loved this part: "With hearts as big as the skies, I hope they never have to cry." I think you could maybe add in more imagery but other than that it was really good!
ReplyDeleteGreat poem I ecspecially liked the part where you talked about friednds coming over and jumping in the pool to be cool. I found this part really interesting because you can actually compare it to everyday life when you see how differently some kids act in front of their friends.Maybe to make it more clear you could somewhere in the poem specify who rachel and shawn are for those that dont know that way the last line will make more since.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work!!